Safeguarding the Home

Matthew 19:3-9

“WHAT therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder.” This is the essence of the Master’s teachings concerning marriage and the home. His lesson on the subject was occasioned by an attempt of the Pharisees to “tempt” him. They hoped that they could trap Jesus into saying something which was contrary to the instructions of Moses, and thereby discredit him as a teacher in the eyes of the people. They tried this on several occasions and in various ways, but they always failed.

Probably by now the Pharisees had learned about Jesus’ views on the subject of marriage. In his Sermon on the Mount he had said that “whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery.” (Matt. 5:32) In making this assertion Jesus, in part at least, repudiated a ruling made by Moses which said, “Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement.”—Matt. 5:31

Evidently the Pharisees reasoned that if they could get Jesus to declare himself in this manner in their presence, they could expose him as being disloyal to Moses. The question they put to him was, “Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?” In answer to this, Jesus referred them to the Genesis record of creation and of the law which the Creator there inaugurated; namely, that male and female’ when united in marriage become one flesh. This joining, therefore, was according to divine law, hence no human being has a right, arbitrarily, to bring about a separation.

This was the answer the Pharisees were waiting for, and they quickly asked Jesus how he harmonized his view with the teaching of Moses on the subject. Certainly they did not expect the answer which the Master gave them—“He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.” In other words, Moses had made a concession to the unrighteousness of the people, and whether or not the expedient met with divine approval, it did not change God’s original arrangement nor make it wrong.

Those who are not sincere in the use of the Scriptures are prone to add to or take away from what the inspired ‘Word actually says, and this was true of the Pharisees’ reference to Moses’ ruling on divorce. They asked Jesus if it was lawful for a man to put away his wife for “every” cause. Apparently this was their interpretation of what Moses taught on the topic of divorce, but it was a distortion of his teaching.

Turning back to what Moses actually said (Deuteronomy 24:1), we find the reason under which divorce was allowed by Moses was that the husband “found some uncleanness in her.” The marginal translation reads, “matter of nakedness.” We cannot be sure just what this refers to, but apparently it is to some serious offense on the part of the wife having to do with something which was forbidden under the Law. Certainly this could not be construed to mean for “every” cause, as the Pharisees indicated.

Jesus, explaining in greater detail how the divine law should operate among Christians, forbade divorce, except where one of the parties should be guilty of fornication. Perhaps, after all, this is not too much different from the ruling made by Moses. While this ruling set forth by Jesus should help a great deal to safeguard the home, as the title of our lesson suggests, it can serve only as a legal safeguard under divine law, and if adhered to only through constraint, and not in spirit, its value is largely lost.

I Corinthians 13:4-7

WHILE Paul’s heart-searching treatise on the subject of divine love (translated “charity” in our Common Version) was not particularly designed by him as a safeguard to Christian homes, it can well be adapted to this purpose. Whether it be in the home, or in the church, or in any association with others, to the extent that the spirit of love is manifested there is certain to be peace, harmony, and unity. Love will find a way to surmount every difficulty occasioned by human imperfection.

Love is long-suffering and kind. How many marriages go “on the rocks” because the husband or wife, or both, fail to be patient with the other by not manifesting the spirit of kindness in times of stress. “A soft answer turneth away wrath,” the Scriptures state, yet how often harsh and unkind answers are employed when they should most be avoided.—Ps. 15:1 “Love envieth not; love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up.” Here are characteristics of divine love—unselfishness—which also are bound to be helpful in maintaining a true spirit of unity in a Christian home. There is an apparent sequence in these three characteristics. One who envies another will vaunt himself so as to appear the equal of the other and thus worthy to receive for himself that which he envies in the other. This leads to a “puffed up” attitude of mind and heart which is sure to display itself in one’s actions, and thus make for friction and strife in the home. Thus, where love is lacking a great deal of the conduct in the home will be “unseemly.”

Love “seeketh not her own.” The love referred to by Paul is manifestly not the fleshly love which should exist between husband and wife, for in this respect a wife properly seeks her own, and is entitled to his love; and likewise the husband, his wife’s love. But divine love operates on a higher plane. In the daily living together of husband and wife there are bound to be minor differences of opinion, differences of tastes and desires. If the husband is always determined to have his way, or the wife hers, there is certain to be a strained relationship. But love seeketh not her own. Love is willing to yield to the other, and where both are governed by this principle how easy it should be to settle differences.

Love “is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil.” Evil provokes even those who are endeavoring to be guided by the principle of love. But love hesitates to attribute evil when there is any other possible explanation for what is said or done. And above all, love will not listen to rumors of evil. Therefore, love will not be easily provoked.

Love “rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth.” This simply means that when one is filled with the spirit of divine love he will shun iniquity, and will be glad to note and encourage in other members of his family that which is right and true and good. How wonderfully this should help to safeguard the interests of any Christian home!

Love “beareth all things.” Regardless of how much a husband and wife, or other members of a family, may be devoted to each other there will be times when they will need to bear with each other. All are imperfect, and where imperfection exists, whether it be in the home or elsewhere, there are sure to be petty annoyances. But love will bear with these and still be kind.

Love “believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” This must be construed to mean that love believeth all good things. Love will refuse to believe a derogatory rumor about another. Love will gladly believe the best, and will always hope for the best. When confronted with situations which come short of what was hoped for, love will give grace to bear all things.

Truly, divine love, that great principle of unselfishness, should be a potent factor in safeguarding the interests of a Christian home. And whether in the home, the church, at business, or at work, let us endeavor to manifest love more and more. It will help to make our home a better home. It will do much to promote good will among our brethren in the church. And those with whom we come in contact in the world will see that we are different, and, perchance, will be blessed by our example.

QUESTIONS

Did Moses grant the Israelites the privilege of divorce “for every cause”?

What is the one condition under which a Christian may scripturally obtain a divorce?

Explain how Paul’s treatise on the subject of divine love should help to safeguard the unity of a Christian home.

| Home Page | Table of Contents |